Sunday Dose Poem Revision 2
Sunday Dose (revised) Image poem Tiny white package, big and strong , You bring my relief like cloudburst in drought, Living in the palm of my hand, Your shell is smooth between my fingers, Guardian of groggy mornings, your home will be in my mouth later Dissolving deep in my throat Bitter medicine results in my calm, A thief of pain , Plucking the weight from behind my eyes, Massaging my throbbing temples and veins. Early in the morning, You call my name, Sweet and salty acetaminophen, Your promise written on a package, Small and mighty, potent when active In revising this poem, I focused on clarity, the emotion, and consistency while maintaining the original essence of the work. Feedback highlighted specific areas for improvement, such as refining word choices and demonstrating emotion through imagery rather than direct statements. For instance, I replaced "prosecutor" with "guardian" to better align w...